My scribble

Another assignement

2011-06-07T20:51:00.001-07:00

So here I am again in the hole full of fire, this time nude… (readers are advised not to make any wrong judgment combining the words hole, fire and nude.) As usual, work again is the culprit…

Went for a consulting assignment which I had never done before. And soon before I realized that I suck at it, my customer realized it. Then it was fun..Fireworks..Carnival.. the who and whos of my company got involved and took what and what from the customers mouth…and gave back all and all to me. Then the usual thoughts started pouring back to me..This is not for me.What is that I am good at …should I start farming.or trading …or a resort..or any other business… but then it required balls.. I have it. But you know.Not in that old mighty form.Just hanging in there. :(

So now they are planning to send me again there… London is a beautiful city with an ugly face..This time I am supposed to be doing a detailed study in half the time..i can feel fun again.. Fireworks might be replaced with high frequency nuclear warheads… carnival would be catastrophic.. but then accepting it as i chose to be loser than be a coward...

My cakewalks....

2011-04-16T09:07:00.001-07:00

People close to me have said that when it comes to me getting a wife it would be like a cake walk.. well the time has come now..and believe me ..i have been walking on quite a few cakes for the last 6 months and till now havent struck the cherry...

Now it would be a moment of pride and shame when i say that i have left the decision to find me a wife to my parents... this came as a surprise to all my relatives, to my friends, to my other social circle.. and last but not the least ..to my parents ....(as to them, it wasnt quite a surprise, but was kind of a 110 kv shock)...

And now that the search is happening for the last few months and me being rejected left right and center without mercy by a few good looking prospects.. i am in search of those who had raised my expectations telling about cakes and the walks on it..

This is the time when i have started being philosophical and leave things to the fate and cling on tightly to the hopes ..reading inspirational quotes and texts .. the next phase i am expecting to move into is the state of a depressed romancer ..followed by a loner...and then the psychotic woman hater.. :P

Having said that.. the little devil in me at times feel relieved in hearing the sad stories of my troubled married friends and how they wished to get their bachelor life back.. honestly deep in my mind i wish i remain a bachelor.. i wish i get married.. i wish i remain a bachelor.. i wish.. i wish...... i have no clue...:(

Back!!

2009-12-04T05:36:00.001-08:00

Everyones life goes through its highs and low..well for the last 8 months, even mine was not an exception... it had its own highs and its own lows.. but the only difference was the highs lasted for roughly 1 week altogether and the lows the remaining 7 months and 3 weeks..

Now what was the reason?.. Top level interrogation revealed work as the culprit.... but a detailed analysis showed my long lasting companinon laziness as the prime reason. Summer time, holiday seasons, jobless friends etc contributed their own noble share to it.
Now i guess i am back to my normal routine.... come to office on time (or an hour late), read 4-5 online newspapers, do a wiki search on the terms i did not understand, read personal mails, reply to them and then go for lunch.. After lunch break read official mails, orkut, facebook, do some 1 hour of work..by that time i will be tired.. now i will pack my bags..and rush to my bike...

life is bliss...

My rainy day realizations..

2009-05-21T22:17:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was a great day... it rained cats, dogs,giraffes,apes and every other thing under the sun.... big time.. started from office at the usal 6.45 ..then the following events unfolded..

Had to close all the windows in the cab as it started raining big time and i was sweating my every liquid out- Realization - Rains are best, when its outside the house, and whn you are inside it

Cab driver nearly ran into a pit- Realization - parents prayers are always strong

The one hour drive took 2hrs yesterday - Realization - leave office early when cloudy

The traffic stopped 2kms from my house - Realization - traffic follows the same policy everywhere in the world, when it rains - it just stops

The water on the roads was knee deep- Realization -Its not the same feeling when the body gets wet by rain and when the shoes get wet.. especially leather shoes-

Walked 2Kms to home-Realization-2Kms look 20 Kms in pouring rain,no umbrella,knee deep water and when drainage joins the rain water

Reached home,found the hall and kitchen sunk in water from balcony - Realization-Heavy rain doesnt distinguish between roads or kitchen, neither does traffic

2hrs of massive cleaning exercise with roomate- Realization- When in need...... every man cleans

Dinner time, saw 7 chappatis and half boiled dal and a note by the maid "Gas cylinder over, cooked only this much"and we are 4 guys in the house-Realization - The depth and length of hunger is always indirectly proportional to the quantity and quality of the food

Drinking water was not deliverd due to rain - Realizaton - 2 chappatis, half boiled dal and half glass of water at times can be the best dinner the world has ever provided

Roomate lost his phone-iPhone on the road,on his way to the house -Realization- That bugger will never learn.

blah blah blah....

2009-03-11T16:26:00.000-07:00

Why are the people who talk the most often the least respected? Why does a person's individuality measured by his/her talks rather than the actions? Why is a serious/reserved person earns more respect than the talkative one. For some these questions just don't make abt sense but for others it does make a lot of sense. Talkative character sketch is something which has been looked down right from the kindergarten classes of a kid.. A kid who is talkative is always in his teacher's bad books no matter if he is good at studies or extra ciriculars.. By the time the kid grows up in silence and start facing the world.. he sees that silence is indeed golden..but thn speech is equally gold.. i have decided next time i see a person who talks more..i will listen ..listen and then see his works.. and thn i will chose whether he deserves my respect or not.. for i am not ready to let him go off, just bcoz he talks a lot....

A cold search..

2009-02-06T08:29:00.000-08:00

Being a very good guy, I almost fall into any sort of traps set up by girls. It has developed into a habit for the past few years…say 26yrsL..Whether it may be calling me up late night from the railway station asking for a pick up because she isn’t sure that she saw a Godzilla boarding the train or by saying that she doesn’t carry her cash on the days when she sees her neighbor’s dog lying in southwest direction., I am always there..
Through a deep rooted self diagnosis and a rare tantric self study, I was able to identify that this happens not just because of ignorance and innocence, which also has its due share in the events, but mainly because of one thing.. Desperation…aaaaahhh!!!! Not just the plane one, but the ready to erupt, high voltage, highly disruptive desperation.

Now I am here in the US, the land of opportunies, sky scrappers, most modern machines, ultra modern life style etc etc.. Yeah yeah I know, I am coming to that point…the 34-28-32 curves.. For an Indian who is not born in a metro, that will be considered as the 8th wonder of the world.. “Man such things exists eh!!!” This is the typical dialogues my friends back home crack when we watch a Hollywood movie.. Though they say that I am the one who the crack that dialogue the most.. I deny!!

But alas!! Here I am in the coldest month of the year.. minus 8 , minus 5… the only time minus part was removed by the weather authorities was when it stuck Zero. ((For my next sentence parental guidance is advised, if read by children below 18 or the “yuk that was gross” kind of girls and guys ) Here if i pee in the open air, before touching the ground, it gets frozen and at times I need to break it off part by part… and by the time i finish it, i will be turned into a snow man...well if not literally something like this would happen… and I expected to find the curves and the figures.. bull shit..!!. The only organ I can see of any human here is their eyes.. rest everything covered, even their toe. L by the time I make out that the person who was beside me is a guy or a girl, he/she would have passed by, forget checking out their figure. For the first 2 weeks I did check out …some 5-6 guys from behind, thinking they are babes…with long hair and a fully covered thermals… damn it..!!

The search of an innocent desperate soul continues in a -8 degree Celsius miles and miles away.

On that day...

2008-11-12T20:04:00.000-08:00

Day of event -2nd October 2008

Importance of the day(for lesser updated souls) - Gandhi Jayanti

who is Gandhi ( again for the least updated souls) -Gandhi is the father of our Nation

What did he stand for (for the souls who are as good as dead) - Independence, Ahimsa,No corruption etc etc

Apart from wiping of crow shit and dusting of Gandhi statue by the "high interest volunteers" on that day, couple of more things are this day's speciality. One, people think about him(this is a once in a year activity) and second its a national holiday.

Scene 1
So on this Oct2, i woke up at 8 and after (or rather during) my compulsive morning chores i closed my eyes in deep meditation and made a decision, today i will be a proper Gandhian. I will think and act as that great soul did.

Scene 2
9.30 AM - Time to meet some friends..After dressing up i stood in front of the mirror and looked at myself and wondered. Can someone who is wearing a Puma Tshirt, Benneton Jeans and Reebok shoes exactly be a Gandhian. Well its all in the mind Putr..its all in the Mind.

Scene 3
I took my roomie's bike and half way through the journey, a great Indian cop waved his never ending arm . "STOP ..STOP Sir" came the first sentence ...the usual oneliners followed. "License , RC Book , Insurance ".With a Gandhian smile i showed him the papers. Then came the next question. Pollution control certificate..? Damn Damn! not again.I dint have it . And my facial expression made a faint smile on his face. I know what he was thinking that time " i gotch u kid, i got a prey" but my mind was saying "no man, not agian, this isnt the old kid"

Scene 4
He took my papers and walked towards the usual traffic police aid post. Having taken that journey many a time, this time i decided, i will not give him his usual quota."SO, now what" his next question. Gandhigiri putr Gandhigiri putr my mind whispered. I made it clear that i am not going to pay him. That faint smile again came to his face. He told in that case he will have to fine me and i need to pay Rs 300 at the local police station, and i raised my voice and with pride uttered the magical words "YES I WILL PAY THE FINE"

Scene5

He took out the receipt book and wrote the date , instantly and very naturally my hand reached the right pocket of my jeans. Took out my wallet and handed him a 100 rupee note. After getting his quota now there were no fine, no receipts, he let me ride free . I reached my friends, went to KFC, had a bite with a Coke, went for an English movie. Came back home and crashed...

The End

The Unexpected

2008-10-26T22:31:00.000-07:00

The Romeo of my college happened to be the best friend of the villain..Me…
Clouds, thunder, rain…everything came together. As this story is all about unexpected things…the rain also was unexpected.. Unexpectedly a weird thought of seeing my college girls getting wet and drenched unexpectedly in this unexpected rain came to my mind.. I have learnt in my lower primary classes decades ago, that water makes things wet.Yes it does dodo...my mind confirmed it... A 70mm smile came to my face... The adrenaline rushed.Rushed and rushed, not willing to settle down.

The only angel on my right shoulder , poked me and rung a bell “ ..Sinning..SINnnnn…It’s a SINnnnn…. “
But the devil on my left shoulder, whacked me and said.. “Rain… Wet..Babes….white chudidaar…yellow chudidaar….heavy rain….water …once in a life time opportunity… no tickets..Divyaa..Sandhayaa…Maria….Tracy…..”The devil on my head also said the same, so did the one on my ear, my eyes, my leg, my stomach, my chest , even the little asshole devil also made a tweaking noise..”Don’t miss it dear”....

I always respected the law of majority.. I shared my juicy thoughts with my fellow devils..my 8 friends standing right beside me.. all i could hear after that was a thunder right beside me.. in the nick of time the whole place was empty..all I could see was bags lying on the ground ..abandoned by their respective owners. Some even left their hall tickets behind. My friends have already reached the amphitheatre. I ran..Expectedly.. expecting big things..Expecting small things. Expecting medium things…..

Upon reaching the spot.. I swallowed a big gulp of air..an unexpected irony had crept in..a guy who ran with all his might to see the cuts and curves of his college chicks ends up in front of 8 macho men all wet, disappointed, with baring teeth, ready to deliver that deadly punch right on the bridge of my nose. There were no girls. Not even one. Being a part of that gang, my friends left me alone with a 5 to 10minutes nonstop abuse in the pouring rain. Heartbroken, I took refuge in the shade of the nearby tree and when the tiny mosquitoes started freaking out on me I thought I will go to my best friend’s house right beside my college and change. Knowing where he keeps his key, I reached for it and opened the door.. DAMN!!.. irony- part 2…unexpected things again-part infinity..

All I could see was my best buddy about to kiss his beautiful girly and there at that precise moment I opened the room.. Next thing I saw was a big bouquet of flower flying towards me, the flower vase followed.. Bang!! It hit its target.. and i lay on the ground..!!

The world at this time

2008-10-22T22:26:00.000-07:00

Ever imagined what the people around the world will be doing now, right now..when i am scratching my head and writing this blog.

London-Thur 7.50 AM - haaaaa...Yawn...deep yawn... and sleep again..Early morning syndrome is visibile.Some people just managed to get up from the bed.. both eyes half open with a strong force pulling it downwards.. one hand scratching their ass and the other hand scratching their head. While some others would have already reached their destination and would be aiming at that hole in the urinal. Only a very few suceeds in hitting the target.The others just wet the wall.

Melbourne -Thur 5.45 PM - After office..hurray hurray..today is thursday..and tommorrow is friday.Its decision time here. Should i meet my girl...or should i meet my beer... The latter always wins. Smart guys always end up with a beer on the beach..with their girlies...

India -11.00 AM- Its office hours here. Majority of the population will be in front of thier office computers and files and monority in them will be working. Others will be pretending to work. Some others who are the "cut and right" type dont even pretend, they just sleep on their desk.

China - 1.35 PM-Its lunch time or post lunch time or just before lunch time for somepeople there. Whatever it is , this time their thoughts will be hovering around one thing. The food. The lunch they just had, they are having or they are about to have. For some its the PMS period (read Post Meal Syndrome and not Pre Menstural Syndrome), Heavy yawns will be highly visible in this part of the world at this point of time. Eyes drooping down syndrome can also be noticed.

Iraq-8.35AM - Home to office leaving time.They hug their loved ones and leave. In the background, you might frequently hear the sound of big blasts and guns.Never bother, its an everyday thing there.

Dubai-9.35AM - Early morning blues will be highly visible here as its the morning hours in the office.Employees getting pelted left right and center by their bosses in the nearby cubicles can be heard.The noise from the construction work will sooth your ears. Dint know eh, no crude oil is remaining there & they have realized that world cant run on palm oil.Hence tourisim.Underwater city, above water islands,sea on the atmosphere,upside down hotels,floating restraunts and flying ships will soon be visible.

Las Vegas - Wed 11.00PM- Yeah baby, casinos, babes,games,lights, beer,brandy ,bra,whisky,wines,women, Microminis and lingerie.These are common sights here and grey headed desps staring at them will be even more common. Its a paradise for aggresive playboys and a magnet for guys like me.. the humble losers. :--(

New York - Thur 2.30 AM -Snorrrr....Snorrrrrrrrr....Snorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr... Its not sleeping time there.. Its snorring time. The bid dady is sleeping. Cops and cocaine are on streets. Guns and girls would be silent. Near to every bed you can see some common sights. Am empty beer can, a half eaten half baked pizza slice,a panty and an underwear, a worn out condom (the number varies with the people in the bed ), a switched on television and an abandoned baseball glove.Couple of stinking socks is never a rare sight and rare smell.

I confess

2008-10-21T22:42:00.000-07:00

I Confess that

I have given my dog milk mixed with whisky

I have tried reaching my nipples with the tongue
I have buried an egg to see if it grows
I hid my sister’s notebook under her bed
I have peeped into my bosses salary slip
I have looked at my best friend’s ass and imagined my pen’s cap in it
I have thrown my kitten up in the air to see if it lands in 4 feet
I bicycle through the road in front of the house of my secret crush to see her unders

I have shagged in front of a mirror

I have dug a hole in the tree to help the new branches pops out fast

I have injected a dead chicken with water

I have burried a coin to make more money
I have worn my undies the otherway round to my college

Busy man.........

2008-06-15T05:08:00.000-07:00

Too much time and too little things to do..yeah this might make some of your eyes roll..in this this era where multi tasking has crept into even our daily bathroom chores.. i clear my throat and say again... too much time and too little things to do...

Well if not for others..my current state of affairs is somewhat like this...this is how my weekends pass by..after around 14 rs of sleep i woke up at 1pm yesterday...ate..slept for around 3hrs more..ate..back to a 14hrs sleep...yeah the mathematics isnt accurate here..but i dont deny..watched TV at times.. but thats it...no more additions..these 3 things only...then it became today..cant actually say it as today..its yesterday in a different name.....

Now when i take an intervel..after my food and before my sleep..i lay back and take a list of "to do things"..nothing...absolutely nothing.wow god has created some people like this also..awesome..Now you will be thinking how my weekdays will be...well that goes like this...

I reach office by 9.have breakfast till 9.15...reach my desk... read the daily headlines...if there are interesting stuffs like a celeberaty caught with hidden cam or a politician involced in a rape case...or my fav team won the match..then i will read it..else will browse for the second online newspaper...after this being repeated for almost 5 newspapers...and after i am convinced to the core that i am an update man today..i will move on ..to read the reviews of friday releases...the amount of time taken for this is directly proportionate to the amount of movies released that friday..and inversely proportionate to the length of the scirt of my colleage who sits right beside me.....after this i check the emails...if there is no much action items for me for the day..i move to checking my official mails..(please note that the former was my personal emails)..by now it would be lunch time...with a happy face i rise from my chair..with the gestures of a tired man...i slowly push my body to my cafeteria...hog...come back to my chair...take some rest..thn i will work for an hour or so...after that a tea brake..by that time i will be tired..i go work again for 30 mins...and then i will leave.....

5 days like this..and here comes saturday and saturday.....

My big potato.....

2008-06-13T08:44:00.001-07:00

Recently my friend in his blog described me like an evolutionary chart of a potato..a small potato followed by a big potato...i immediately ran to the mirror in my next room..oh god..that journey appeared to be never ending...after i reached in front of the mirror ...i took off my T shirt in the nick of time.. (it reminded me of the typical English movie sex scenes,where the lady sprang forth on the man and rips open his shirt, and both breathless)...i was also breathless..but only after seeing my pot belly hanging like a ripe coconut which is about to fall from its tree..no not coconut..i would call it a jack fruit..i wondered how on earth can one part of the human body blow up so unproportionately when compared to the other organs...and that too without the permission of its owner....i slowly started breathing again... dude...wake up..decide now...if i go like this i will not fit into one photo frame...the girlies will not have the time to reach my face after covering my big potty..my colleagues will start seeing a big belly walking down the street ..and behind it will be my humble body clinging on to it....

it was the decision time.. no more junk food..light breakfast..oil and ghee was shown the exit way from my edible list..moreover oil prices are soaring.... absolutely no-no to rice and yes-yes to fruits.. exercise..gym..swim..hop..skip..jump..what ever it takes to get that thing back to its position...

next morning..woke up at 5..went to the nearby gym..came back home with aches..but the determination held on..i should teach my belly a lesson.. i wanted to make it into a six pack from the current family pack state...

days passed one by one..my decisions also started passing by one by one..snubbing me...from 5 am my wake up time stretched to 7.30 am..gym became just another building that existed in the neighbourhood...i dint want to peep into others' building...oil and ghee re-entered into my edible food list..skip-hop-jump-swim gave way to cuddle,stubborn sleeps...fruits stayed back in the markets..i refused to carry them home..junk food again became the best gift of god....

but one decision lingered..its still hanging in the hook of my mind...any time it would fall down..but as of now, its holding on tightly..and that is no rice at night...i was proud..so was my belly..it looked up every time and said to me..loser u failed again..and i am still growing..

today after coming back from my office...i stopped in front of my usual dinner place..fortunately or unfortunately i saw the waiter serving hot spicy chicken biriyani at the nearby table..it was properly garnished...and mouth watering.. no ..no dude..no..no rice...i was adamant..but still my eyes were on that plate..and my mind trying to control my instantaneous hormonal imbalance and enzyme reactions.... the waiter walked up to me.. in an stiff voice i asked him for the day's special... he politely replied.."Spicy hyderabadi dum biriyani", .......rest is history................it has fallen from its hook...

Markets...markets...markets.............

2008-06-13T08:44:00.000-07:00

Gone are those good 'ol days when my mom wakes me up early in the morning during my vacations and forced me to go to the fishmarket right across the river with my dad to buy some fresh fish. I still remember it with a 70mm smile , me walking through the middle of the road half asleep and the other half refusing to wake up..with one hand rubbing my eyes and the other hand holding my barmuda's elastic tightly so that it will not fall off and make my french fries visible to the rest of the morning crowd who would have woken up early to get a warm sunshine and a good view of the morning spectrum.. it would be more embarrising for them to have seen it than me who would have still carried on without even knowing that one the basic necessities of the human species have just fallen down from his waist... i still cherish those moments when the big truck drivers honk arrogantly from behing my back and i look back and see that the headlight of that mighty truck milli meters away from my tiny little butt..and that half drunk ,half sleepy but fully muscular truck driver singing songs at me early in the morning from his seat and his middle finger dancing to the tune..i would give an innocent smile at that fellow...abusing him to the core in my sub conscious mind..as my conscious mind is always afraid of the muscular drivers.. then and now... :-)

This is the part of my nostalgia when i hear about the word markets...until 3 months back.. there are lot of markets..some are regular markets,some are seasonal,some are early morning markets and others late night ones..but there is one that opens on time and closes on time..functions only on weekdays just like IT industry guys.. this market makes the rich poorer,,,and the poor ...poorest..its called the Stock Market.. i was poor till 3 months back.but now i am poorer by 20k..i went short on a stock which went up nearly by 10% in 2 days..this is what my stock broker say to me everytime i ask him why i lost money... i am yet to figure out which language he is speaking................

Now you will understand why when i think about my childhood markets i am so happy...at least the only thing i bad that time was losing my early morning sleep and hearing some early morning rhymes.but i would get some good fish currey for dinner.. but now..i lost my money..i dont know who got it...how i lost it... the only similarity now and then was ...in both periods..i lost my sleep.....

They said.....

2008-05-09T07:28:00.000-07:00

Some of the quotes from some greats and not so greats would have inspired us, left us thinking ... here are those ones which have made me miss my breath several times......For some this might seem stupid, for others it might seem worth reading... carry on..

Unselfishness is something that exists only in the dictionary, with the exception of a mother.

The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing in the right place, but also to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment

To lose one parent may be regarded as a misfortune; to lose both looks like carelessness."

The English country gentleman galloping after a fox - The unspeakable in full pursuit of the uneatable."

The length of the movie shud be directly proportional to the endurance of the bladder...

God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage. If God brings you to it, He will bring you through it.

REMEMBER, GROWING OLDER IS MANDATORY. GROWING UP IS OPTIONAL

Character may be manifested in the great moments, but it is made in the small ones."

"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO, What a Ride"

"In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends."
- Martin Luther King Jr. (1929-1968)

“The basic economic resource - the means of production - is no longer capital, nor natural resources, nor labor. It is and will be knowledge." - Peter Drucker.

Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take but by the moments that take our breath away,"

Last week I stated that this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been visited by her sister and now wish to withdraw that statement. "Mark Twain

If you hate a person,you hate something in him that is part of yourself. What isnt part of ourselves doesnt distur us.... Herman Hesse

Though we may be learned by another's knowledge, we can never be wise but by our own experience." - Montaigne.

Chance favors the prepared mind-louis pascal.

God wants us to meet a few wrong people before meeting the right one.
So when we finally meet the right people,
We should know how to be grateful to them.

The aim of education is the knowledge not of fact, but of values." -Dean William R. Inge

The only reason some people get lost in thought is because it's unfamiliar territory." Paul Fix (1901 ~ 1983

Some persons do first, think afterward, and then repent forever." Thomas Secker (1693 ~ 1768, former Archbishop of Canterbury

"A little knowledge that acts is worth infinitely more than much knowledge that is idle." Kahlil Gibran.

Poor is the man whose pleasures depend on the permission of another
Madonna

You might as well fall flat on your face as lean over too far backward-Jame Thurber

There are two kinds of light - the glow that illuminates, and the glare that obscures - James Thurber
“There is nothing noble in being superior to some other person. The true nobility is in being superior to your previous self.”

Defeat is not when you fall down,It's when you refuse to get

"I was brought up to believe that the only thing worth doing was to add to the sum of accurate information in the world." - Margaret Mead.

"As our circle of knowledge expands, so does the circumference of darkness surrounding it." - Albert Einstein.

Everyone has a "best friend" during each stage of life - only a precious few have the same one

Something we were withholding made us weakUntil we found it was ourselves. -Robert Frost

Have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary. Steve Jobs

It's not what we eat but what we digest that makes us strong; not what we gain but what we save that makes us rich; not what we read but what we remember that makes us learned; and not what we profess but what we practice that gives us integrity. Francis Bacon, Sr.

The heart is happiest when it beats for others

He who laughs last didn't get the joke.

Only those who attempt the absurd can acheive the impossible.

"A bride at her second wedding does not wear a veil. She wants to see what she is getting." - Helen Rowland

I live in my own little world.But it's OK... They know meHere!

Life isn't about how to survive the storm, but how to dance in the rain."

Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground

You are old, when you fall down; you wonder what else you can do while you're down there.

It is in your moments of decision that your destiny is shaped -Anthony Robbins

Only enemies speak the truth; friends and lovers lie endlessly, caught in the web of duty.- Stephen King

Look into any man's heart you please, and you will always find, in every one, at least one black spot which he has to keep concealed.- Henrik Ibsen

A thing long expected takes the form of the unexpected when at last it comes.- Mark Twain

A Father is a man with pictures in his wallet, where he used to keep his money when he was single.

It doesn’t matter how often a married man changes his job, he still ends up with the same boss.

Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves

Why why why cant we...?

2007-10-20T10:14:00.000-07:00

GOA a state in India, so small that if any 6 footer spreads his/her legs, they could easily cover both the ends of the state..... that small a state which is covered with the blue water anywhere and everywhere and also with the white water, brown water , the red water (the colour depends on your brand)... but the purpose of this blog is neither to detail the beauty of the place nor to describe the trip that i had made a couple of weeks back with my friends to this place... but rather to share a different thought that passed my mind in all the days i was there ...

The thought struck me for the first time, when i was all alone in the beach at 2AM with a beer in one hand and a stone in the other hand, basically to throw at the dogs that came sniffing thinking that i am a junk piece of flesh gazing at the endless ocean half asleep and half drunk in the depth of the night. That night, in my semi sleepy n partly sober self, i noticed a group of men, in their mid 30's, same as my mood ..half drunk screaming at the top of their voice about life and how to enjoy them,,,, n how they enjoy it that time and how they plan to enjoy for the rest of the time they were there in that place. They were singing loudly, some were howling, they were the sloshed ones, my active sober self told me that, the others were laughing out loud for the silliest of the jokes that their friends cracked..
The thought crossed my mind "What causes the humans to be so free and so happy when they are in a vacation".. yes yes i know there are a lot of reasons for this question like, they are free to do what they want and how they want it... or perhaps they know that they have come here to enjoy and have fun..etc etc.. but when my partly drunk mind asked the same question to my party sober mind, i got the answer...it is because before start their vacation, they themselves convince their mind that they are going to enjoy, they are going to have a blast of a lifetime and that there is no place for worries and tensions during this period... yes a decision every human would have made either knowingly or unknowingly before they even start deciding about their vacation....

So then if this is the case, my partly drunk mind was curious, why cant every human make this decision at the start of every day...convince your mind that today its the start of a vacation n there is no place for worries n tensions....but by that time i had finished the beer...n my partly sober had undergone a significant change... it did not answer...

A trip to heaven.....

2007-09-17T07:45:00.000-07:00

I plan to visit heaven once in a year from now on.. being my first visit this time, i should not screw it up...i have jotted down some of the things i should carry while i travel...

Good clothes is a must... St.Peter should not shove me off at the first sight. First impression is always the best impression..rmbr i am visiting every year...

Tooth brush n other toiletories... I have heared hygiene plays an important role in heaven..

Money.. Just in case, as i know the banks of earth do not have their telemarketing access to the heaven above, firstly they dont have a target customers there and secondly they dont know the ISD code....n hence i wouldnt find an ATM or a swiping machine there....

Wish list... By any chance if i get to see a glance of my God, i cant fumble for words or recollect my wishes...so i would just hand him over the list.. therby avoiding wastage of his time...

Offerings... yeah thats something i should be careful of,.. should not carry any perishables as by the time i reach there.... they would have perished...

My ipod (with fully charged)..I havent talked yet to the people who have gone there,,, there are hardly in my neighbourhood.... so i dont know the distance.... hence carrying one...

but more importantly i wish to carry myself..my true self..without any pretending or masks... i should carry my ego, i should carry my sins,, my sorrows,, my pride n my jealousy...my greed and my deeds,,,, for i know that once i see the heaven... all these which i carry melts away n would never bother me again....

I wonder if humans could actually do this....imagine then..the world would be a better place to live in....n what about the heaven... it would be a garbage with all the sins of the world deposited there... more n more everyday...tonnes and tonnes every second.....

I am sure it was wrong..

2007-08-31T07:39:00.000-07:00

Work expands to fill the time available... thats a famous saying.. till now my greatest hobby was to criticise all the great words... but thn of late this one seems to be hitting me hard...
everytime this god'amn thing is becoming true... i have started leaving office by 8.15 instead of 6.30...i even started to have my dinner at office.. but still the pending work was not leaving me...oh shit!! this cant be left alone like this.. i need a solution......so i started a self evaluation.. this i havent done before in my life.. so it was a pretty sad start ,.my inexperience was clearly visible..... i gave weightages... evaluated and analysed... interpreted and summarized.. i came to a confused conclusion.. that either i am a sad workoholic or i am inefficient....i dint want that..so i re evaluated my self.. re assigned weightages... re summarised and reinterpreted.. n still reached the same conclusion... i gave up the evaluation... i still believe it was wrong.... :-)

Let us celeberate...

2007-08-25T06:26:00.000-07:00

With more than 3 crore gods comes that much festivals...

India is celeberating any time of the year.... when one city goes to the slumber after a joyous carnival, another awakes in the hope and ecstacy of an upcoming celeberation..This is what differenciates her from the rest of the world... this is what gives her the precious culture....

Some festivals welcome the seasons of the year, the rains, the harvest, the full moon ..the others celeberate religious occasions where the Gods and the temples form the basis. The other forms of festivals are associated with the birthdays and remeberences of national leaders and national days...like Gandhi Jayanthi, November 14, the Independence day etc...The same festivals may also be known in differnent names in the different corners of the country.

When comes to the festivity too, the difference is seen.. Holi is welcomed with colors, lights greet Diwali, flowers bloom for Onam, clay idols for Ganesha Chathurthi...
Wherever they are and how ever they are celeberated, there are some aspects which is common acros the corners of the country, The celeberations centers around the rituals of prayer, seeking blessings of elders, exchanging goodwill, decorating houses, wearing new clothes,music, dance and feasting...No matter what the festival is or where or how it is celeberated these common attributes are never missed...

Today as i woke up , i can see Kerala at its festive best to celeberate Onam. She is decked up to celeberate the most anticipated festival of the state. With flower carpets, new clothes and grant feasts... Kerala is going crazy..The secular character of Onam is peculiar to this land where unity had always coexisted with diversity, especially during festivals, when people come together to celebrate life's unlimited joys.
Also today is the Teej festival in Uttar Pradesh, that marks the story of Krishna and Radha.. Where swings n songs coexist to form a unique form of fesitive sprit..

Tomorrow its another festival in a different place... there will be sleepless nights, songs , prayers and feasts... there will peace,joy and happiness there....

Let us get up from our slumber.... look up and see the celeberations.. no matter if its miles aparts, no matter we cannot see it.... let us buoy the spirt within and light it up inside.....

weekends weekends n weekends....

2007-08-12T06:57:00.000-07:00

As my roomie has gone abroad for a short stint..i am all alone in my place...n whn weekends come a feelin of lonliness creeps in usually...
but this time it was different.. suddenly some frnds came home..wow unexpected..whn i reached back late after office on friday...i saw a group in front of my house.. slowly whn i got nearer i started seeing a familiar face, another one followed, then another..n more..i knew at tht moment..tht it is absolute fun tht awaits me ther...

had a great time..by around 1 or 2am, they started leavin, some people had to be dropped back home, some stayed over...friday was fun...
thn came saturday..again as i was crawling thru the day, my phone rung again..there is another devil..."dude wassup..wht plns..." the first question... whn told that my day was filled with sleep n food, he told he is comin to my plce..wow...saturday was a busy day thn....

Sunday, again in the mornin, there rings my phone. ,...this time it was a lunch...met couple of frnds..had lunch with them... one had to say abt her love failure n the other abt her new love..it was irony ...but i enjoyed....
came home by afternoon..n whn i was gettin ready for my usual nap, there rings my phone.... "dude wht plns", the question came in... followed by "i am comin to ur place"..n thts it.. i wait now..knowin tht the rest of my evenin is full of fun n laughter...

now i know i am not alone... now i know hw to spend my weekends.. i wait for the next ...n i wait anxiously.....

The road must be taken..

2007-08-03T09:42:00.000-07:00

Went home the other day.. returned yesterday..

It was another journey, same destination, same purpose n the same mindset..

No not this time...the mindset is not same...things arent the same anymore,whole new problems await me there.. Dad hospitalized,roomies travel to abroad, has not found a 3rd room mate yet, , deadlines galore at work, boring n monotonous, friends all left abroad...so prettly lonley days in front.... ..Positive aspects cannot be ruled out though..the whole place just for me...unlimited net n freedom..no dependencies... thats all... when counted the negatives n positives results are slightly inclined to negativity...could be because it was a pessimistic mind's count...or is it really bad day awaitin me... i dont know..but with new hopes and in search of a better life the journey continues..

it could be a treacherous path with twists n turn or a smooth straight and a safe road ahead..the only optionis to take that road..no matter what is in store there or where it leads me.. the road must be taken..hope its peace and prosperity out there...hope i find my happiness there...anyways if not a calm passage, let the landing be smooth atleast....in hopes and in anticipation...i take my first step..

Playin with a legend...

2007-07-14T04:45:00.000-07:00

The players.Hantuchova Vs Serena Williams,
The game. Wimbledon 2007

It was great to watch the match between these two. Not because of the profile of the players involved or the importance of the match ...but because of something that made me think after watching in...
Everyone knew the outcome well in advance...everyone read about the drama that took place in the court. The injury, the fall, then the comeback n finally the winning of miss Williams..

All the articles n newspaper clippings spoke about the great Williams, her will power , her confidence, her determination.etc etc....yeah its true...when mixed with the literature of the leading newspapers, she was a legend that day..
But nowhere did I read about the one in the other side of the court.. Hantuchova. She was merely picturized as a supporting actress for promoting the main role of the game. Someone whom people used to make the other one immortal...
If thought through this with a pinch of empathy in it... We all could hear the weep of a person whom the whole world betrayed that day, just to glorify the other...situations like these appear very often, especially in sports…and situations like these have never been so kind to the person who bears the brunt..

What Hantuchova did was to play her game, the best possible way she could…. n still that day passed by without a word of appreciation..

She got completely covered in the shadows of a much hyped legend that people chose to ignore her.
Its like these instances, that kills the fire within to be the best.. or at times kindle the fire within to bring out the best. its situations like these that cuts down the desire to excel or at times help it build up…. These are the moments where either a legend starts growing or a legend is being shattered…

We will wait n watch..What effect this has brought in to Hantuchova..will she??

Another week , another weekend....

2007-07-01T02:53:00.000-07:00

Another week ...another weekend...

got up late...sat in front of the tv..took a nap again... woke up again...played music...got ready...wnt out ..had lunch...came back...

now again playin music...will take a nap soon..will wake up...will sit in front of the tv ..will go for dinner...will sleep again....

this is wht i have been following all these years.. perhaps this year its worse.as these are the only things i have done on a weekend til now...

but then yeah..meeting friends is also the part of the schedule..but not every weekend...

So is this what all the bachelors out there do.. or are there any guys doing it in a much better way..or worse also..for that matter...anyways...its time for one one the weekend activities.... bye n will comeback whn i wake up....

which is better..

2007-06-27T10:04:00.000-07:00

Is it better to be a looser and njoy the world rather than being a winner n feel the pressure to keep winnin everytime you do something....?
Is it better to be an individual without any individuality rather than be someone with an individuality that restricts him from singing loudly or laughin out loud..
Which one is better... a joker who makes a smile on the people who mingle with him or just another human...
Is it better to be your mom's pet than to be your girl's timepass....
which is better.. to cry and then laugh or to be mum everytime...

What ever it is ...i am always in the first part...

They came and they left....

2007-06-14T08:55:00.000-07:00

If you had a chance to read the history of a man's life, any normal man for that matter, you perhaps would stumble upon in every page atleast one name of his friends or an incident he had with them...this he would have written in gold..

Yes its them who makes him what he is and shape him to what he will be.. ,

They are the ones with whom he would have fought the most, laughed , shared and teased the most... n if he had earned them from his school or from the UG course, then its his life time assets...this is the same story for each and every man...any man who had walked on this earth.. When he is with them he sang loudly, he jumped high, laughed till the tears came out, forgets his girl, his family, the time of the day, the weight of his wallet , the heaviness of his ego and many a time, he forgets himself ......

Time passes by with the spring in the air, but then comes the reality..its the kick on the face....when the much talked about "expectations and obligations of a man" starts draggin him to his new worlds, somewhere in that journey he would slowly start loosing the firm grip that once held him so tightly in every moment of his life.. he is alone now..

After that its a long break, new work, new faces and phases in life, most common words that come from him will be "busy, hectic, work load, no time, completely forgot, appointments, pre occupied, sorry, i will try, i should be free" etc etc..But when lonliness starts takin its toll in his newly built world slowyl but steadily, the old times starts creepin up...that laughs and fights, that long bike rides and short trips, that dirty jeans and stinkin canvas.... Then come an awakenin.. followed by a mail or an sms or something that technology brings as the boon.. the "keep in touch " syndrome slowly spreads afterwards... Calls starts pouring in...he is busy again but this time not from the new materialistic world of his, but from that old nostalgic past

A get together is in plan... the time and date is fixed, the friends confirm...one of that most expected and looked upon hours...They meet , they hug, they comment on his new tummy, the small musch,they talk, they laugh ouder and louder,,

The good ol days come back, the old songs start singin again..that artificial smile that the new world had presented him paves way to that old thunderous laughs,..after so looong, one day he sleeps with a light heart... He wakes up in the next morning and again the reality kicks him...his time is over,, get back....back to the new world again ..busy, hectic, work load, no time..etc creeps in... bye to the friends, hugged em n there he goes... but this time whn he walks back to his new world, he is no more lonely, no more alone, he has regained, regained that firm grip which he had once let lose ,,,he wouldnt again let it slip from his palms, he wouldnt allow it to be lost again, as he learned that once he lose it, he lose himself, he lose his life...

With the smile in my face, with a new courage in my life, the courage that i regained after long time, the feeling that if i fall now,they would catch me, they would hold me closely... i walk again to my new world.. i proudly say... have my friends now.. i gained them back......

Here I enter

2007-06-08T08:14:00.000-07:00

Today June 8th 2007, happened to be one of those days in my life, which brought back my forgotten hunch to do something more in life. Something which others do often or something which I haven’t done before..A hunch that got lost somewhere in the pages of my life's history book...
The attempt to create a blog here is a sheer thrive on spontaneity.A cautious effort to make me believe that i still live inside me... Whether it is yet another successful start before a distressing end or whether it is the morning breeze that give way to a mighty evening storm… I don’t know..
But with all the curiosity and ecstasy... Here I enter…