Why why why cant we...?

GOA a state in India, so small that if any 6 footer spreads his/her legs, they could easily cover both the ends of the state..... that small a state which is covered with the blue water anywhere and everywhere and also with the white water, brown water , the red water (the colour depends on your brand)... but the purpose of this blog is neither to detail the beauty of the place nor to describe the trip that i had made a couple of weeks back with my friends to this place... but rather to share a different thought that passed my mind in all the days i was there ...

The thought struck me for the first time, when i was all alone in the beach at 2AM with a beer in one hand and a stone in the other hand, basically to throw at the dogs that came sniffing thinking that i am a junk piece of flesh gazing at the endless ocean half asleep and half drunk in the depth of the night. That night, in my semi sleepy n partly sober self, i noticed a group of men, in their mid 30's, same as my mood ..half drunk screaming at the top of their voice about life and how to enjoy them,,,, n how they enjoy it that time and how they plan to enjoy for the rest of the time they were there in that place. They were singing loudly, some were howling, they were the sloshed ones, my active sober self told me that, the others were laughing out loud for the silliest of the jokes that their friends cracked..
The thought crossed my mind "What causes the humans to be so free and so happy when they are in a vacation".. yes yes i know there are a lot of reasons for this question like, they are free to do what they want and how they want it... or perhaps they know that they have come here to enjoy and have fun..etc etc.. but when my partly drunk mind asked the same question to my party sober mind, i got the answer...it is because before start their vacation, they themselves convince their mind that they are going to enjoy, they are going to have a blast of a lifetime and that there is no place for worries and tensions during this period... yes a decision every human would have made either knowingly or unknowingly before they even start deciding about their vacation....

So then if this is the case, my partly drunk mind was curious, why cant every human make this decision at the start of every day...convince your mind that today its the start of a vacation n there is no place for worries n tensions....but by that time i had finished the beer...n my partly sober had undergone a significant change... it did not answer...

A trip to heaven.....

I plan to visit heaven once in a year from now on.. being my first visit this time, i should not screw it up...i have jotted down some of the things i should carry while i travel...

Good clothes is a must... St.Peter should not shove me off at the first sight. First impression is always the best impression..rmbr i am visiting every year...

Tooth brush n other toiletories... I have heared hygiene plays an important role in heaven..

Money.. Just in case, as i know the banks of earth do not have their telemarketing access to the heaven above, firstly they dont have a target customers there and secondly they dont know the ISD code....n hence i wouldnt find an ATM or a swiping machine there....

Wish list... By any chance if i get to see a glance of my God, i cant fumble for words or recollect my wishes...so i would just hand him over the list.. therby avoiding wastage of his time...

Offerings... yeah thats something i should be careful of,.. should not carry any perishables as by the time i reach there.... they would have perished...

My ipod (with fully charged)..I havent talked yet to the people who have gone there,,, there are hardly in my neighbourhood.... so i dont know the distance.... hence carrying one...

but more importantly i wish to carry myself..my true self..without any pretending or masks... i should carry my ego, i should carry my sins,, my sorrows,, my pride n my jealousy...my greed and my deeds,,,, for i know that once i see the heaven... all these which i carry melts away n would never bother me again....

I wonder if humans could actually do this....imagine then..the world would be a better place to live in....n what about the heaven... it would be a garbage with all the sins of the world deposited there... more n more everyday...tonnes and tonnes every second.....

I am sure it was wrong..

Work expands to fill the time available... thats a famous saying.. till now my greatest hobby was to criticise all the great words... but thn of late this one seems to be hitting me hard...
everytime this god'amn thing is becoming true... i have started leaving office by 8.15 instead of 6.30...i even started to have my dinner at office.. but still the pending work was not leaving me...oh shit!! this cant be left alone like this.. i need a solution......so i started a self evaluation.. this i havent done before in my life.. so it was a pretty sad start ,.my inexperience was clearly visible..... i gave weightages... evaluated and analysed... interpreted and summarized.. i came to a confused conclusion.. that either i am a sad workoholic or i am inefficient....i dint want that..so i re evaluated my self.. re assigned weightages... re summarised and reinterpreted.. n still reached the same conclusion... i gave up the evaluation... i still believe it was wrong.... :-)

Let us celeberate...

With more than 3 crore gods comes that much festivals...


India is celeberating any time of the year.... when one city goes to the slumber after a joyous carnival, another awakes in the hope and ecstacy of an upcoming celeberation..This is what differenciates her from the rest of the world... this is what gives her the precious culture....


Some festivals welcome the seasons of the year, the rains, the harvest, the full moon ..the others celeberate religious occasions where the Gods and the temples form the basis. The other forms of festivals are associated with the birthdays and remeberences of national leaders and national days...like Gandhi Jayanthi, November 14, the Independence day etc...The same festivals may also be known in differnent names in the different corners of the country.


When comes to the festivity too, the difference is seen.. Holi is welcomed with colors, lights greet Diwali, flowers bloom for Onam, clay idols for Ganesha Chathurthi...
Wherever they are and how ever they are celeberated, there are some aspects which is common acros the corners of the country, The celeberations centers around the rituals of prayer, seeking blessings of elders, exchanging goodwill, decorating houses, wearing new clothes,music, dance and feasting...No matter what the festival is or where or how it is celeberated these common attributes are never missed...



Today as i woke up , i can see Kerala at its festive best to celeberate Onam. She is decked up to celeberate the most anticipated festival of the state. With flower carpets, new clothes and grant feasts... Kerala is going crazy..The secular character of Onam is peculiar to this land where unity had always coexisted with diversity, especially during festivals, when people come together to celebrate life's unlimited joys.
Also today is the Teej festival in Uttar Pradesh, that marks the story of Krishna and Radha.. Where swings n songs coexist to form a unique form of fesitive sprit..

Tomorrow its another festival in a different place... there will be sleepless nights, songs , prayers and feasts... there will peace,joy and happiness there....

Let us get up from our slumber.... look up and see the celeberations.. no matter if its miles aparts, no matter we cannot see it.... let us buoy the spirt within and light it up inside.....

weekends weekends n weekends....

As my roomie has gone abroad for a short stint..i am all alone in my place...n whn weekends come a feelin of lonliness creeps in usually...
but this time it was different.. suddenly some frnds came home..wow unexpected..whn i reached back late after office on friday...i saw a group in front of my house.. slowly whn i got nearer i started seeing a familiar face, another one followed, then another..n more..i knew at tht moment..tht it is absolute fun tht awaits me ther...

had a great time..by around 1 or 2am, they started leavin, some people had to be dropped back home, some stayed over...friday was fun...
thn came saturday..again as i was crawling thru the day, my phone rung again..there is another devil..."dude wassup..wht plns..." the first question... whn told that my day was filled with sleep n food, he told he is comin to my plce..wow...saturday was a busy day thn....

Sunday, again in the mornin, there rings my phone. ,...this time it was a lunch...met couple of frnds..had lunch with them... one had to say abt her love failure n the other abt her new love..it was irony ...but i enjoyed....
came home by afternoon..n whn i was gettin ready for my usual nap, there rings my phone.... "dude wht plns", the question came in... followed by "i am comin to ur place"..n thts it.. i wait now..knowin tht the rest of my evenin is full of fun n laughter...

now i know i am not alone... now i know hw to spend my weekends.. i wait for the next ...n i wait anxiously.....

The road must be taken..

Went home the other day.. returned yesterday..

It was another journey, same destination, same purpose n the same mindset..

No not this time...the mindset is not same...things arent the same anymore,whole new problems await me there.. Dad hospitalized,roomies travel to abroad, has not found a 3rd room mate yet, , deadlines galore at work, boring n monotonous, friends all left abroad...so prettly lonley days in front.... ..Positive aspects cannot be ruled out though..the whole place just for me...unlimited net n freedom..no dependencies... thats all... when counted the negatives n positives results are slightly inclined to negativity...could be because it was a pessimistic mind's count...or is it really bad day awaitin me... i dont know..but with new hopes and in search of a better life the journey continues..

it could be a treacherous path with twists n turn or a smooth straight and a safe road ahead..the only optionis to take that road..no matter what is in store there or where it leads me.. the road must be taken..hope its peace and prosperity out there...hope i find my happiness there...anyways if not a calm passage, let the landing be smooth atleast....in hopes and in anticipation...i take my first step..

Playin with a legend...

The players.Hantuchova Vs Serena Williams,
The game. Wimbledon 2007

It was great to watch the match between these two. Not because of the profile of the players involved or the importance of the match ...but because of something that made me think after watching in...
Everyone knew the outcome well in advance...everyone read about the drama that took place in the court. The injury, the fall, then the comeback n finally the winning of miss Williams..

All the articles n newspaper clippings spoke about the great Williams, her will power , her confidence, her determination.etc etc....yeah its true...when mixed with the literature of the leading newspapers, she was a legend that day..
But nowhere did I read about the one in the other side of the court.. Hantuchova. She was merely picturized as a supporting actress for promoting the main role of the game. Someone whom people used to make the other one immortal...
If thought through this with a pinch of empathy in it... We all could hear the weep of a person whom the whole world betrayed that day, just to glorify the other...situations like these appear very often, especially in sports…and situations like these have never been so kind to the person who bears the brunt..

What Hantuchova did was to play her game, the best possible way she could…. n still that day passed by without a word of appreciation..

She got completely covered in the shadows of a much hyped legend that people chose to ignore her.
Its like these instances, that kills the fire within to be the best.. or at times kindle the fire within to bring out the best. its situations like these that cuts down the desire to excel or at times help it build up…. These are the moments where either a legend starts growing or a legend is being shattered…

We will wait n watch..What effect this has brought in to Hantuchova..will she??

Another week , another weekend....

Another week ...another weekend...

got up late...sat in front of the tv..took a nap again... woke up again...played music...got ready...wnt out ..had lunch...came back...

now again playin music...will take a nap soon..will wake up...will sit in front of the tv ..will go for dinner...will sleep again....

this is wht i have been following all these years.. perhaps this year its worse.as these are the only things i have done on a weekend til now...

but then yeah..meeting friends is also the part of the schedule..but not every weekend...

So is this what all the bachelors out there do.. or are there any guys doing it in a much better way..or worse also..for that matter...anyways...its time for one one the weekend activities.... bye n will comeback whn i wake up....

which is better..

Is it better to be a looser and njoy the world rather than being a winner n feel the pressure to keep winnin everytime you do something....?
Is it better to be an individual without any individuality rather than be someone with an individuality that restricts him from singing loudly or laughin out loud..
Which one is better... a joker who makes a smile on the people who mingle with him or just another human...
Is it better to be your mom's pet than to be your girl's timepass....
which is better.. to cry and then laugh or to be mum everytime...


What ever it is ...i am always in the first part...

They came and they left....

If you had a chance to read the history of a man's life, any normal man for that matter, you perhaps would stumble upon in every page atleast one name of his friends or an incident he had with them...this he would have written in gold..


Yes its them who makes him what he is and shape him to what he will be.. ,


They are the ones with whom he would have fought the most, laughed , shared and teased the most... n if he had earned them from his school or from the UG course, then its his life time assets...this is the same story for each and every man...any man who had walked on this earth.. When he is with them he sang loudly, he jumped high, laughed till the tears came out, forgets his girl, his family, the time of the day, the weight of his wallet , the heaviness of his ego and many a time, he forgets himself ......



Time passes by with the spring in the air, but then comes the reality..its the kick on the face....when the much talked about "expectations and obligations of a man" starts draggin him to his new worlds, somewhere in that journey he would slowly start loosing the firm grip that once held him so tightly in every moment of his life.. he is alone now..



After that its a long break, new work, new faces and phases in life, most common words that come from him will be "busy, hectic, work load, no time, completely forgot, appointments, pre occupied, sorry, i will try, i should be free" etc etc..But when lonliness starts takin its toll in his newly built world slowyl but steadily, the old times starts creepin up...that laughs and fights, that long bike rides and short trips, that dirty jeans and stinkin canvas.... Then come an awakenin.. followed by a mail or an sms or something that technology brings as the boon.. the "keep in touch " syndrome slowly spreads afterwards... Calls starts pouring in...he is busy again but this time not from the new materialistic world of his, but from that old nostalgic past

A get together is in plan... the time and date is fixed, the friends confirm...one of that most expected and looked upon hours...They meet , they hug, they comment on his new tummy, the small musch,they talk, they laugh ouder and louder,,

The good ol days come back, the old songs start singin again..that artificial smile that the new world had presented him paves way to that old thunderous laughs,..after so looong, one day he sleeps with a light heart... He wakes up in the next morning and again the reality kicks him...his time is over,, get back....back to the new world again ..busy, hectic, work load, no time..etc creeps in... bye to the friends, hugged em n there he goes... but this time whn he walks back to his new world, he is no more lonely, no more alone, he has regained, regained that firm grip which he had once let lose ,,,he wouldnt again let it slip from his palms, he wouldnt allow it to be lost again, as he learned that once he lose it, he lose himself, he lose his life...

With the smile in my face, with a new courage in my life, the courage that i regained after long time, the feeling that if i fall now,they would catch me, they would hold me closely... i walk again to my new world.. i proudly say... have my friends now.. i gained them back......

Here I enter

Today June 8th 2007, happened to be one of those days in my life, which brought back my forgotten hunch to do something more in life. Something which others do often or something which I haven’t done before..A hunch that got lost somewhere in the pages of my life's history book...
The attempt to create a blog here is a sheer thrive on spontaneity.A cautious effort to make me believe that i still live inside me... Whether it is yet another successful start before a distressing end or whether it is the morning breeze that give way to a mighty evening storm… I don’t know..
But with all the curiosity and ecstasy... Here I enter…